Thursday, September 8, 2011

Why IVF?

I know IVF is a controversial method of conceiving a child. We chose IVF after much prayer and research on the process. We came to the conclusion that God was leading us in this direction for a few reasons.

[1] Medically.... it was the only way for us to have a chance at a pregnancy. Of course, I believe that God can do anything He wants and I could do 6 cycles of IVF and then boom after all that I am pregnant through the normal way! We know that God has given us doctors to help with lots of conditions, heart blockages, cancer, infertility etc. Some say well if God made you infertile you should remain infertile. Maybe so, but to those I say because you have a blockage in your heart means God allowed it so you should stay that way and die. No, you should have a surgery! :)

[2] Adoption vs. Fertility Doctors (IVF): When it came to adoption we could never agree on a country, domestic or international. You have to both be 35 in most countries, except Russia to adopt. As with all pregnancies there are many unknowns and the cost is 2 to 3x more expensive than IVF. I am 28 and John is 33. Great ages for IVF, bad ages for international adoption. We did foster care for a stint and were burned pretty bad by our agency. The plan to foster again is in our future plans, but we are taking a break from it only doing respite care at the time (short term placements). Infant domestic adoption would be cool, but God is not blessing that route right now. Maybe in the future!

[3] IVF decision: John and I agreed almost instantly on IVF. And all family members (from my in-laws, parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, siblings, cousins and sibs-in-laws) are super supportive and excited for us. My grandfather is giving us a really nice donation in the thousands, my aunt and mom have given us a few hundred dollars and my sister even though she is pregnant herself and has 2 other children is making us a change-piggy bank. The bank loan we took out is the exact amount of the car we turned in off lease last August. We prayed constantly for God to stop it if it wasn't His plan.... He didn't. The opposite was true... paperwork, financing, and everything to date was super easy. John was at work about to fax the financing in to the loan company and he prayed "God don't let the fax machine take this if it isn't what we should be doing." The fax machine at his work hardly ever sends faxes through on the first try and doesn't work very well. He said the machine sucked the paper up so fast there was no turning back. LOL. I think things like this are from God. Does that mean we will get pregnant, only time will tell, but I believe God has provided doctors to help Him perform miracles. We see people who should die live everyday with cutting edge procedures.

The biggest decision for us was to decide when is a life a life...  We prayed about this too and did lots of research. We believe the answer to that is at implantation. Scientists may be able to help sperm and egg join, but only God can perform the miracle of implantation. And the other decision was should we spend this much money. Well, we decided it is like buying a nice car (which ppl do several times in their lifetime). A child is so much better and more important than a car. You could compare the price to a Camry or maybe a Lexus or BMW (depends on how many cycles and how much meds needed). LOL!

Overall if you are considering IVF for you and your spouse, it is a very personal decision and only you, your spouse and God can make it! :)

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